The Truth about Feminism
Teen Skepchick is, primarily, a skeptical site. But we are affiliated with the feminism movement because our goal is to help women enter skeptical activism, which is primarily male dominated. I cannot vouch for the rest of the bloggers here but I, myself, am a self proclaimed feminist. When I saw this You Tube video I knew the jig was finally up. Since Barbarossaaaa (those last three a’s stand for available attractive armadillo) and his pals have clearly already figured it out I might as well say it myself.
The whole time I have been a feminist I’ve secretly been working toward the elimination of the father and, eventually, men as a whole. Even when I wasn’t writing about feminist topics I put secret subliminal messages in my posts that make men loose their fertility over time. I’ve even come up with a 5 Step Plan to End All Men™. Yeah, it’s true. Taking a cue from comic book super villains I will now tell you all my plan so you may marvel at it’s brilliance and tremble in fear.
1. Unite the world under a single totalitarian leader (preferably myself).
2.Catalog every human being on the planet via a retinal scan. Then tattoo a bar code on their skin, so they can be easily identified. (One might say the retinal scan was unnecessary if your just going to put a bar code on them. And they’d be right. I just think retinal scans are cool.)
3. Castrate and/or put a chastity belt on every male on the planet. (Take your pick, boys! Castration chastity belt or both!)
4. Any woman that wants to have a baby will have to file paper work with the state and pass a mothering test. All sperm used for in vitro fertilization will be of the XX verity. So no new males will be born.
5. Some men will be bound to be hiding in the sewers, the jungle, the mountains and remote villages in third world countries only accessible by canoe. Wow that’s a lot of places. Probably the easiest thing to do would be to give every cataloged citizen a gas mask and release toxic gas across the whole planet. It would make the earth deadly toward people but it’s worth it just to get rid of those men.
Now that I’ve written my 5 Step Plan to End All Men™ down it’s not sounding as good as it did in my head. Why am I going through all this anyway? Wouldn’t it be a lot easier just to try to maintain something as close to equality as I can? By Jorge, I’ve got it! Feminism isn’t about a nightmare scenario where government controls breeding and men are pitiful, stripped of the only source of self esteem they have. Feminism is about getting women out of the kitchen and into the workplace. Where they should be respected, not because of their gender, but for the quality of their work.
Maybe Mr. Armadillo needs to realize that the people calling for and end to the father, if there really are any, are extremists and do not represent the majority of feminists. It’s not either a nuclear family with the father as the head or lesbian bone-marrow sex. And maybe I need to not write posts at 1:30 A.M.