Suspension of Disbelief: Cowboys vs. Aliens
Suspension of Disbelief is a weekly feature, in which we review movies, books, TV shows, and other popular culture for the skeptical teen.
Movie Title: Cowboys vs Aliens
Director: Jon Favreau
Starring: Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford and Olivia Wilde
I absolutely loved the premise of this movie when I heard about it. So often we see alien invasion movies where we have modern technology to go up against the aliens, but in 1875 all they have a those old guns that sort of suck, sticks and stones.
It is set in New Mexico and starts with Daniel Craig waking up with a weird metal thing on his arm and no memory of who he is (it all comes back throughout the movie). He is totally awesome and can kicks anyone’s ass which results in some pretty fantastic fight scenes. Turns out he’s an outlaw so when he goes to this town they try to arrest him but then the aliens come so they sort of forget about that because the aliens are posing a bit more of a threat than Daniel Craig – and he’s the only one with an alien firearm attached to him. The aliens are stealing people and experimenting on them while stealing Earth’s gold. So they want to go find the aliens to get back their friends… so Daniel Craig drinks some weird magic Indian drink that makes him see a hummingbird and helps him to regain his memory. Then they go to the ship and fight it and crap… the Indians use arrows to kill the aliens, which is sort of cute.
Did Not Like:
- This first point is a big spoiler so skip if you don’t want it to be spoiled – The girl in the movie… turns out… that she “took on the form” of a human because her planet was destroyed so she’s actually an alien. What I don’t get is why she “took the form” of this scrawny, helpless little human who can hardly defend herself against a fly.
- I hated all the sob stories. There were two side stories – one about Harrison Ford and his son (and his… sort of son this Indian kid that he adopted) that was all sappy and heart warming… the movie could have done without it. Also, there was a love story with Daniel Craig – it sort of added to the movie (more than the dumb father-son story) but it probably would have been better if they left Daniel Craig as a hardcore-sexy-loner type.
- The aliens seem kind of stupid for an advanced species. For some reason they got totally owned in a fight against the cowboys and indians, despite having really cool and powerful alien guns. WHY DIDN’T THEY USE THEM!?
- The acting… dear lord! Harrison Ford! Just stop! Please!
- Overall there was a lack of continuity in the storyline and this was a storyline that could have been super creative –but then wasn’t.
- The aliens were pretty pathetic looking. I mean… they were interesting, sort of… no… nevermind, they weren’t. They were boring and lacked originality which SUCKS because aliens are awesome.
- It was just cool to see aliens AND cowboys at the same time. I don’t really like cowboy movies, so if I’m going to watch one aliens definitely helps out.
- Huh… that’s all I can really think of.
Don’t get me wrong – the movie was mildly entertaining and Daniel Craig is a total babe… it just wasn’t as awesome as I thought it would be. I’m only going to give it 1.5 out of 5 Daniel Craig faces. I still STRONGLY recommend going to see Captain America – it was totally awesome.
Image cred: Film School Rejects